Max Atkinson's Blog

Claptrap 6: An offer I couldn't refuse

This is the sixth in a series of posts marking the 25th anniversary of the publication of Our Masters' Voicesand the televising of Claptrap by Granada Television.

Part 1: Claptrap - The Movie
Part 2: Eureka!
Part 3: News leaks out of the lecture theatre
Part 4: How to get a book published

Part 5: In the right places at the right times

The conference at which I'd had the unexpected chance to show some of the results of my forthcoming book to people from the media was only a week or two before the Chesterfield by-election that was scheduled for 1st March, 1984 - and where former Labour cabinet minister Tony Benn, who'd just lost his seat in parliament, was standing as the Labour candidate.

A bird in the hand?

Peter Snow, one of the presenters of BBC 2's Newsnight, had been at the conference - after which, he was quick to phone me about going on the programme on the night of the by-election. I had, after all shown quite a few video clips of Mr Benn in action during my presentation, and had devoted several pages to his extraordinary speaking abilities in Our Master's Voices.

Although I was a regular viewer of Newsnight in those days, I knew that there weren't very many of us. Nor did five minutes on BBC 2 at dead of night seem the most promising way to promote the book - especially when someone from World in Action, with it's many millions more viewers, had told me not to sign up with anyone else until I'd spoken to him.

Over the next few days, there were more flattering calls from Newsnight urging me to agree to do an analysis of of Mr Benn - but still no word from Gus Macdonald of Granada. Had he really meant it, I wondered, or was it just conference ale and camaraderie that had been speaking? Should I commit to the BBC's bird in the hand or keep waiting for Granada's unspecified bird in the bush?

There was only one thing for it. Dreading another rejection to add to my collection from publishers (Claptrap 4), I steeled myself and dialed the number on Gus Macdonald's card.

Or a bird in the bush?

"Ah, I'm glad you've called" he said (much to my relief). "I've had an idea I'd like to talk to you about and was about to phone to suggest meeting for lunch."

Granada's London offices were in Soho, where I soon found myself at a Chinese restaurant being confronted with an offer that seemed far too good to be true.

"We'll find someone who's never made a speech before," he said, "then we'll film you coaching her on the stuff in your book and see what happens when she speaks at a party conference."

"But" - I'd never claimed it was a 'how to do it' book, had no idea whether the findings could be put into practiceand asked the obvious question: "What if it doesn't work?"

"Doesn't matter," he said "we'll just fade it out and roll the credits as she's climbing up to the podium. It would be a far more interesting way to tell the story of your research than all these boring Horizon programmes with professors droning on in front of rows of book shelves."

He'd even worked out that it would have to be someone from the SDP, because the new party had rules that would more or less ensure that a member would get to speak if they got their names down soon enough - whereas speakers at Labour Party conferences had to catch the eye of the chair and speakers at the Conservative Party Conference had to be vetted in advance. In any case, he knew the SDP president, Shirley Williams, and was pretty sure he'd be able to get her to call our Eliza Doolittle to speak.

And an Eliza, rather than and Edwin, Dolittle it would have to be, because this was the age of Margaret Thatcher and it was well known that she'd had a lot of help with speech-making and presentation.

To say I was taken aback by the idea would be an understatement. He was offering me the chance and the funding to carry out an experiment that I knew the Social Science Research Council would never have supported in a million years. Admittedly there was the rather large risk of putting my research on the line in front of 15 million viewers, rather than a few hundred readers of a learned journal. But if I'd been afraid of taking risks, I'd have had more sense than to go into conversation analysis in the first place.

Would a failed speech have been screened?

In retrospect, there are two reasons why I don't believe for a moment that Granada would have gone ahead and shown the programme if the experiment hadn't worked - however neat a way of telling the story it might have been.

One reason was that no contract had ever been written down or signed, which presumably meant that they could easily have ditched it and shown something else in the event of failure.

Another is that I learnt from Ann Brennan, after she'd won her standing ovation, that she too had asked the same question, "What if it doesn't work?", the night before she made the speech.

Gus's reply to her was rather different and more forthright than the one he'd given me six months earlier:

"It would just mean that the book's no b****y good."

Reading between the lines of 'Labour Vision'

In 1981, John Heritage and I video-recorded (on Betamax) the entire broadcast output of the three main party conferences, colleting a data base of about 500 speeches.

Today, the internet has not only made life much easier for rhetoric and oratory anoraks like me, but it can occasionally throw up some intriguing surprises, an example of which sprang out at me this morning.

Looking back on this year's Labour Party conference, I thought I'd have a look at some videos of speeches by likely candidates for the leadership when Gordon Brown (or the electorate) finally decides it's time for him to go.

The most obvious place to look was the 'Labour Vision' collection on YouTube, which is presumably put there by the party itself.

I've already mentioned the idea of 'noticeable absences' in relation to this year's speeches by Nick Clegg and Peter Mandelson. But here, on 'Labour Vision' there's another very noticeable absence - of three likely candidates for the leadership when the time comes.

'Labour Vision' will let you watch this year's conference speeches by Gordon Brown, Peter Mandelson, Harriet Harman, Jack Straw, Alan Johnson, Alistair Darling, Hilary Benn, Ed Miliband and Yvette Cooper.

But notable by their absence are the speeches by three of the younger generation of likely leadership contenders: Andy Burnham, David Miliband and Ed Balls.

This raises some interesting questions:

Why they are these three missing?
Who decided to omit them from the menu on 'Labour Vision'
Is someone trying to tell us that Miliband junior and Mrs Balls are ahead of Miliband senior and Mr Balls in the leadership stakes?
Or could it be that none of them are considered good enough communicators to risk broadcasting their speeches to a wider audience?

It would be nice if someone in the Labour Party could tell us, but I don't suppose they will.

What do Harriet Harman and Sybil Fawlty have in common?

One of the many memorable lines from Fawlty Towers was when Basil told Sybil that she ought to go on Mastermind, special subject "the bleeding obvious."

Until today, I'd always thought that Harriet Harman, deputy leader of the Labour Party, had rather more about her that Mrs Fawlty.

Technically, it was hard to fault the way she brought this year's party conference to a close, deploying as she did, repetition and a 3-part list.

But take a closer look at the content of what she said:

Together we'll fight for those we represent.
Together we'll fight for a prosperous and fair Britain.
And most important, conference, together we'll fight to win.

And consider whether any politician of any party (other than perhaps the Monster Raving Loony Party) could have said the opposite:

Together we'll fight for those we don't represent.
Together we'll fight for an impoverished and unfair Britain.
And most important, conference, together we'll fight to lose.

What, I wonder, would Basil Fawlty have had to say to Harriet? "Special three subjects the bleeding obvious"?

The Hateful Daily Mail

This is the first time I've ever lifted a title verbatim from someone else's blog.

It's taken from one of the UKs top political bloggers, Iain Dale, who is rightly complaining to the Press Complaints Commission about an article by Ephraim Hardcastle in today's Daily Mail, which includes the following classic piece of Mail hatefulness:

Overtly gay Tory blogger Iain Dale has reached the final stage of parliamentary selection for Bracknell, telling PinkNews: 'I hope any PinkNews readers who live in Bracknell will come to the open primary on October 17 to select their new candidate.

You don't even have to be a Conservative to attend.'

Isn't it charming how homosexuals rally like-minded chaps to their cause?

You can read more about why Iain Dale is complaining and how to support him HERE. And, if you have red hair, or have any friends, relations or loved ones with red hair, take a deep breath before reading on.

Down with red heads - Mail exclusive

As for why I think it important enough to mention the Mail' at all, let alone its latest slur, it's to remind people that they've been peddling this kind of 'overtly' prejudicial journalism for decades.

One of the most scurrilous pieces I ever saw came from the pen of Ann Leslie, who's supposed to be so worthy and respectable that her services to journalism have been honoured by her elevation to Dame of the British Empire.

On the day before one of the general elections in which Neil Kinnock was leader of the Labour Party (1987 or 1992), the Mail published a two page spread with a perceptive article by Ms Leslie urging their readers not to vote Labour.

The headline summed it up with a warning never to trust a man with red hair (even though, at the risk of sounding baldist, Kinnock didn't have a lot of it left even then).

In fact, according to this erudite award-winning journalist, it would be too much of a risk ever to vote anyone with red hair into Downing Street. She developed her case in nauseating detail, listing every unfounded stereotype about the allegedly negative characteristics and temperament of 'red heads' that anyone has ever heard of - presenting them, of course, as established facts of life.

So, if it's any comfort to Iain Dale, he can at least breathe a sigh of relief that he doesn't have red hair.

Gordon Brown on the morning after the night before

If you didn't see this interview on Sky News, it's well worth watching.

I don't plan to comment on it, other than to say that I found it fascinating in all sorts of different ways - so fascinating, in fact, that I'm curious to know about the impressions others take from it.

GORDON BROWN: The way he told them

It’s good to see The Guardian taking a leaf out of my book and having a go at doing (part of) my job for me!

Regular readers of this blog will know that I sometimes go through a speech looking at the rhetorical techniques the speaker used (e.g. HERE and HERE) and the amount of applause received – where the average burst is 8 ± 1 second (e.g. HERE).

So I was delighted to see the following piece on the Guardian website today, as all it left for me to do was to spot the rhetorical techniques and note whether the bursts of applause were average, below or above average (in red below).

(Links to other posts since the conference season began can be found at the bottom of the page).

GORDON BROWN: THE WAY HE TOLD THEM
Key moments in the prime minister's speech to the Labour party conference

(from today's Guardian website)

"We nationalised Northern Rock and took shares in British banks, and as a result not one British saver has lost a single penny. That was the change we chose. The change that benefits the hard working majority, not the privileged few." (CONTRAST)

Applause: 9.38 seconds (Average)

"The Conservative party were faced with the economic call of the century and they called it wrong."

Applause: 8.13 secs (Average)

"Call them middle class values, call them traditional working class values, call them family values, call them all of these; (1) these are the values of the mainstream majority; (2) the anchor of Britain's families, (3) the best instincts of the British people, (4) the soul of our party (5) and the mission of our government." (5 PART LIST)

Applause: 11.41 secs (Above average)

"For us the NHS has not been a 60-year mistake but a 60-year liberation." (CONTRAST)

Applause: 12.13 secs (Above average)

"In a crisis, what the British people want to know is that their government will not pass by on the other side but will be on their side." (CONTRAST with embedded biblical imagery)

Applause: 10.13 secs (Above average)

"Always a party of restless and relentless reformers, the new mission for new Labour is to realise our passion for fairness and responsibility in these new global times."

Applause: 5.69 secs (Below average)

"The best way finance can serve our country now is to help ensure that the inventions and innovations pioneered in Britain are developed and manufactured in Britain."

Applause: 7.56 secs (Average)

"And when people say, faced with the constraints of the recession, can you make progress towards a fairer and more responsible Britain, let us tell them we did, we can, and we will."

Applause: 7.25 secs (Average)

"I do think it's time to address a problem that for too long has gone unspoken, the number of children having children. For it cannot be right, for a girl of 16, to get pregnant, be given the keys to a council flat and be left on her own." (3 part list)

Applause: 14.72 secs (Above average)

"Whenever and wherever there is antisocial behaviour, we will be there to fight it."

Applause: 6.06 secs (Below average)

"Britain - the four home nations - each is unique, each with its own great contribution and we will never allow separatists or narrow nationalists in Scotland or in Wales to sever the common bonds that bring our country together as one."

Applause: 13.66 secs (Above average)

"Countries from every continent look to our NHS for inspiration. And this summer didn't we show them? We love our NHS." (PUZZLE + SOLUTION)

Applause: 9.28 secs (Average)

"Others may break their promises to the poorest, with Labour Britain never will." (CONTRAST)

Applause: 5.54 secs (Below average)

"Never again should any member of parliament be more interested in the value of their allowances than the values of their constituents." (CONTRAST)

Applause: 7.50 secs (Average)

"And so I say to the British people, the election to come will not be about my future - it's about your future. Your job. Your home. Your children's school. Your hospital. Your community. Your country." (CONTAST WITH LIST OF 7 AS SECOND PART!)

Applause: 11.88 secs (Above average)

"There is a difference between the parties. It's the difference between Conservatives who embrace pessimism and austerity and progressives like Labour who embrace prosperity and hope." (PUZZLE + 3 PARTED SOLUTION)

Applause: 11 secs (Above average)

"We love this country. And we have shown over the years that if you aim high you can lift not just yourself but your country - that there is nothing in life which is inevitable - it's about the change you choose." (CONTRAST?)

Applause: 10.56 secs (Above average)

"This is the change we choose; change that will benefit not just the few who can afford to pay, but the mainstream majority." (CONTRAST + ch-ch-m-m ALLITERATION)

Applause: 7.47 secs (Average)

OTHER CONFERENCE SEASON POSTS:

FOR REFLECTIONS ON THE CONFERENCE SEASON 25 YEARS AGO:

Type Claptrap into SEARCH BLOG box at top left of page.

Brown surfs applause (briefly) before reverting to type

I've never seen Gordon Brown surfing applause before, but it got his speech off to such a lively start that he got a premature standing ovation. But once that was over, it was back to Brown-style speaking business as usual.

As a result, instant media comments a few minutes after he'd finished were already saying that the opening had got them expecting something better and that they were disappointed by what followed.

I obviously don't know whose idea it was that he should have a go at surfing, but the irony for me was that this is exactly what I had recommended David Cameron to do in order to up his game for last year's Conservative Party conference (HERE),

If you're wondering what I mean by 'surfing applause', here's an excerpt from one of the first posts on this blog that summarises how it works and why it can have an electrifying effect on audiences. Once the video of Brown's speech becomes available, I'll post a clip of the sequence in question.

'If Mr Cameron has already mastered most of the key techniques that set a good orator apart from an average one, the question arises as to whether there’s anything else he could be doing to take the next step into the premier league? And one thing he might like to consider is the art of surfing applause, a technique that’s only to be found among those at the top of their trade. Past maestros include Martin Luther King and Tony Benn, and today’s most prominent exponents are Nicholas Sarkozy and Barack Obama.

'Unlike most speakers, surfers don’t just stop whenever the audience applauds and wait until they’ve finished. What surfers do is to carry on speaking after the applause has started, which creates a number of positive impressions. It makes it look as though you hadn’t been seeking applause at all, and are really quite surprised that the audience has interrupted you with an unexpected display of approval.

'Then, if you keep trying to go on while the audience is still clapping, it’s as if you’re telling them that, unlike less passionate politicians, you’re the kind of person who regards getting your message across as much more important than waiting around to savour the applause. If you’re really lucky, and the broadcasters want to put this particular extract on prime time news programmes, the lack of any clean break between your speech and the applause makes it difficult for them to edit without including the adulation of the crowd as well – so that the various positive impressions are transmitted beyond the hall to the much bigger numbers viewing or listening at home.'

Video clips of other surfers in action can be seen HERE.

GORDON BROWN SURFS APPLAUSE THROUGH A VERY LONG LIST

Having seen the video again, a number of points are worth noting.

First, it's the most extreme case I've ever seen since I first noticed it about 30 years ago - where what I mean by 'extreme' is that it goes on for longer and more persistently than I've ever seen before. As such it comes over as contrived and bears little resemblance to the more 'natural' sounding way in which more skilled exponents like Benn and Obama do it. That's why I think this was carefully planned to provide a rabble-rousing opening to what turned out to be a rather typical Brown speech.

Second, this list is not included in the 'full text' of the speech on any of the websites I've looked at so far, which suggests that the ploy was either a last minute decision, or was designed to spring a surprise on the media (or both).

Third, I was fascinated to see that the applause got under way immediately after the 3rd item in a 14-part list. CORRECTION: Actually, it was a 24-part list that can now be seen in full HERE on the BBC website. The clip below came from the BBC 10 o'clock news, where, interestingly, the editors had cut into it 3 items before the applause got under way.

Fourth, in the first cut-away to cabinet ministers clapping on the front row, all of them look more despondent than delighted, none of them are clapping particularly vigorously and Alistair Darling comes in so late that the Stalin would certainly have had him dispatched to Siberia on the first available transport.