The LibDems have a new 3 part list!

I am grateful to Mark Pack for drawing my attention to this new slogan - for which I was not directly responsible, even though the third item is longer than each of the first two!

For those of you who, unlike me, didn't have their eyes tested yesterday, the list is as follows:

• Stronger Economy.
• Fairer Society.
• Opportunity for Everyone.

As for why a longest third item is a good idea, all is (at least partially) explained in my books.

As for the main message about the growth of wind power, I fear that my brother and his wife will not approve - for reasons best known to Christopher Booker...

The gloomiest day of the year - yet again!

Repeat of a post from 24th October 2009:

If you find the darker afternoons that start tomorrow a depressing and pointless exercise, you might be interested in an article in The Times a few days ago (HERE for the full story from last year).

Apart from relieving the gloom, not putting the clocks back tonight would reduce electricity consumption by 1-2% and save NHS expenditure on dealing with accidents and emergencies:

“During an experiment 40 years ago, when British Summer Time was used all year for three years, there was an average of 2,500 fewer deaths and serious injuries each year. Opposition from Scotland contributed to the decision to return to putting the clocks back in winter.”

If putting the clocks back is such a big deal for the Scots, why don’t we let them do it on their own, especially now they have their own parliament in Edinburgh?

A different time zone in Scotland might be marginally inconvenient for the rest of us, but no more so than it already is when trying to plan meetings in other EC countries.

Time for a bigger slit on Poppy collection boxes - yet again - to mark the anniversary of WW1

 

It is now nearly 5 years since I first notified the British Legion about how they could collect even more cash than usual - and yet more in this centenary year of the outbreak of WW1 - but they have still failed to take any notice of my sound advice. See here. 

If you agree, how about mentioning it to them, if only because they appear to be a bit hard of hearing?

NEW BOOK: dreaming of selling a million!

SEEN & HEARD

Conversations and commentary on contemporary communication

Whenever I've written a book, I always dream of it selling by the million. In fact, I doubt whether anyone would ever write a book at all if they knew how few people would ever actually read it.

In this respect, I count myself as very lucky indeed, as Lend Me Your Ears: all you need to know about making speeches and presentations has become an 'international bestseller'. My earlier Our Masters' Voices: the language and body language of Politics didn't do too badly either and is still available 30 years later. My more academic books also got noticed by appropriate audiences in sociology, psychology and linguistics

But in none of these cases had the internet developed anywhere near to where it is today - with e-books, Kindle and yes, hard copies too!

This blog has, according to Ayd Instone, publisher of my latest book, so far been made up of slightly fewer words than Tolstoy's War and Peace and slightly more than Pickwick Papers by Charles Dickens.

But after editing it down to a similar length to that of Lend Me Your Ears it becomes a more manageable length and gives readers the advantage of not having to gaze at a screen for hours on end.

Needless to say, I'm still dreaming of selling a million, hoping that you loyal blog readers will help to pave the way and that some of you will write 5 star reviews on Amazon...

Promotion or demotion at Sky News?

I've blogged previously about Adam Boulton's tendency to 'um', 'er', pause and otherwise hesitate far more than is to be expected from the Politics Editor of a major 24 hr news channel - not to mention other blogs elsewhere on the hazards faced by speakers who rely too much on teleprompters.

But Adam's problem seems to have been solved more or less completely in recent days - by the simple device of turning him into a news reader rather than an interviewee who answers questions put to him by one of the more regular news readers - who rarely serve as news reporters out in the field.

Whether being transformed from being a news reader rather than a news reporter/editor is a promotion or demotion for Mr Boulton I do not know. 

Perhaps he or one of his colleagues at Sky News knows the answer and will let us know in due course whether it's a temporary measure or it's been done to prevent viewers from having to suffer from listening to the continuous 'umming' and 'erring' of the political editor.

There are of course 3 components (!).

1.       Preparation (including structure, script, attention to detail about the audience)

2.       Delivery (says what it is on the cans)

3.       Impact (audience reaction, newspaper headlines, social media buzz)

Hence:

                                                Ed Miliband                                                                                                   David Cameron

Preparation                                  2                                                                                                                           7                             

Delivery                                          4                                                                                                                           7

Impact                                            4 (maybe higher given it ended in tears!!)                                           6

Max Index                           10                                                                                          20                    

Mr Miliband's style of delivery gets into the headlines

I've blogged before about politicians - including President Obama and Ed Miliband -  using teleprompters, reading from scripts, speaking without scripts, pretending not to have a script, modelling management guru walkabouts, etc.

In his leader's speech yesterday, Mr Miliband excelled himself by forgetting some crucial lines from the script he had tried to remember. Although his last two efforts to memorise scripts more or less verbatim were hailed by the media as great successes, the last thing you want is for journalists and their editors to concentrate on how you said something rather than what you actually said (or didn't say).

And here lies one of the hazards of 24 hour news and the reporting of speeches before they are actually spoken. If Mr Miliband had not circulated the text of his supposedly scriptless text-free speech, he might have got away with it. But he did not and has had to spend the day reading reports of what he had not said, appearing in broadcast news interviews trying to explain his omissions away, etc.

If I were asked, my advice would be to say that there's little to be gained from trying to memorise long speeches - unless you happen to be David Cameron performing in a 10 minute beauty parade for the Tory party leadership...

What if 'energised' Salmond wins???

The Independent newspaper described Alex Salmond's performance in last night's leader's debate as 'energised' - which is surely bad news for Alistair Darling and the Labour Party.

One of the big questions about the debate to me is why did David Cameron and the Tories allow an experienced former Labour cabinet minister lead the Better Together campaign - when the loss of Scotland, legally complicated though it would be, would mean that Labour might never again form the government of the residual UK. In fact, why are the Conseratives opposing Salmond & Co. at all, I wonder?

Then there's the question of what the long term point of a Scottish National party be if they actually win the referendum on independence?

I'm not too keen on the idea of an independent Scotland, in spite of my Scottish ancestry, but I do wish someone would answer some of these rather obvious questions.

P.S. I've just noticed that they both seem to be speaking at the same time in this picture. Is violating the most basic conversational rule of all - one speaker at a time - a sure way to impress your audience???

How to mark the 10th Anniversary of Lend Me Your Ears?

Next month marks the 10th anniversary of this book of mine.

Suggestions on how best to mark it - e.g. with another book based on this blog and/or what - will be very welcome.

Attendance allowance: a Blair/Brown-Lab-Lib-Con victory?

Whether you voted Labour (and I didn't), Conservative (and I didn't) or Liberal Democrat, Labour's Attendance Allowance was a brilliant move that the Con/Lib Dem coalition has, in their own interests, preserved. The big question now is: which of them plans to boast the most about  it at the next election???

Topical cartoon???

Yet again, this week's Private Eye contains some brilliant cartoons, of which this is one of many very different topical themes - keep up the good work, chaps!

Yet another 3 part list (from the Queen): Who, what, why?

One hopes it's not Cava!...

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4 July 2014 Last updated at 14:00

Why is champagne traditional for smashing on ships?

Who, What, WhyThe Magazine answers the questions behind the news11:59 UK time, Friday, 04 July 2014

The Queen will smash a bottle of whisky on the hull of the new aircraft carrier HMS Queen Elizabeth in a break from the traditional champagne. But how did champagne become the tradition, asks Lucy Townsend.

When Queen Victoria launched the HMS Royal Arthur in 1891 she smashed a bottle of champagne against it. It is believed to be one of the first instances of the drink being used in this way.

"It was a very prestigious warship with a royal name so champagne would have seemed fitting, it's a celebratory drink, but before that it had been the tradition to use [other] wine," says John Graves, curator of ship history at the National Maritime Museum.

Launching a ship has always been accompanied by ceremony. The Babylonians would sacrifice oxen, while the Vikings sacrificed a slave to propitiate their sea god.

Wine became customary in England in the 15th Century when a representative of the king would drink a goblet of wine, sprinkle wine on the deck and then throw the goblet overboard.

The answer

• Champagne started being used in the late 19th Century
• It was thought to be more celebratory than wine, which had been traditional previously

"It would have been much cheaper to smash a bottle," Graves adds.

"In the 18th Century the Royal Navy launched so many ships that throwing a silver goblet overboard each time would have become very expensive - so they started using bottles.

"It's quite a clear progression. The red of the wine would have looked a bit like the blood from earlier centuries, and the move to champagne would have been all about the celebration - champagne is the aristocrat of wines."

The Duchess of Cambridge watches a bottle of champagne smash against the 'Royal Princess' ship

Mrs Leif Egeland, wife of the South African High Commissioner, breaks a bottle against the Intermediate Class liner MV 'Bloemfontein Castle' at the Harland and Wolff shipyard in Belfast

This is probably not champagne

In the US, whiskey has been used in the past - the USS Princeton and the USS Raritan were launched using whiskey in the 1845 and 43.

In 1797 the captain of the frigate USS Constitution broke a bottle of madeira wine to mark her launch, while in 1862, Commodore Charles Stewart christened the New Ironsides in Philadelphia by smashing a bottle of brandy over her bow.

"During prohibition water was used in the US to launch a ship," Graves adds. "It would be water from the sea the vessel was to be launched into."

But champagne is now the drink smashed against most ships - though Graves adds that there may be a better alternative.

"I have been told by many ship builders that cheap cava creates a more spectacular display - it's much bubblier that champagne."

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Max Atkinson wonders whether the BBC is recommending that 4th July should also be a national holiday in the UK???

Explore the BBC

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News Front Page World UK England Northern Ireland Scotland Wales Business Politics Health Education Science & Environment Technology Entertainment Also in the news ----------------- Video and Audio ----------------- Have Your Say Magazine In Pictures Country Profiles Special Reports RELATED BBC SITES SPORT WEATHER CBBC NEWSROUND ON THIS DAY EDITORS' BLOG

Last Updated: Friday, 30 July, 2004, 13:15 GMT 14:15 UK  E-mail this to a friend Printable version The art of public speaking... revealed In the words of one Democrat after John Kerry's long-awaited speech to his party's convention: "He was good, but he's no Clinton." When it comes to public speaking, what does it take to hold a crowd?He may be an experienced and highly adept politician, but even John Kerry's supporters acknowledge their man has a notable weakness: his public persona. With his speech to the Democratic Party's convention on Thursday Mr Kerry turned in a better performance than many had expected. But unlike Bill Clinton, or even his running mate, John Edwards, Mr Kerry is judged not to be a natural public speaker. Of course it's not only politicians who wrestle with this tag. A new guide in the UK exposes some of the heart-stopping clangers that have cropped up in wedding speeches. In one case a groom got his bride's name wrong while another made a business-like presentation complete with overhead projector. But all is not lost. Here, Max Atkinson, who once trained a public speaking novice to address a political party conference - and saw his pupil receive a standing ovation - delivers the key messages. LISTS OF THREE Bad speeches can be disastrous for weddings Good speeches are memorable ones, and to that end the more rhetoric, the better. A key device in lodging phrases in the minds of an audience is the "list of three", which dates back to Classical times - "veni, vidi, vici (I came, I saw, I conquered)". Then there was "the father, the son and the holy spirit". Later came "liberté, égalité, fraternité" followed by Abraham Lincoln's "government of the people, by the people, for the people". More latterly, there was former Labour leader Hugh Gaitskell's "fight, fight and fight again [for the party]" and Tony Blair's "education, education, education". THE PUZZLE-SOLUTION Setting out a puzzle, pausing and solving it for your audience is another time-honoured technique says Mr Atkinson. For example, Ronald Reagan declared his candidacy for the American presidential election in 1980 by offering up these words: "This is a moment of quite some mixed emotions for me... I haven't been on prime-time TV for quite a while." Another memorable example is Margaret Thatcher's "You turn if you want to... the lady's not for turning." COMBINING THE TWO The average applause during a speech lasts about eight seconds, says Mr Atkinson. For a more rapturous reception combine these two techniques. Benjamin Disraeli carried it off well with "There are three kinds of lies... lies, damned lies and statistics, while the full Tony Blair quote actually went "ask me my three priorities... education, education, education." USE IMAGERY A "master" of imagery in speeches, says Max Atkinson Imagery requires the use of skilful similes. Think Denis Healey's observation that being attacked by [Tory chancellor] Geoffrey Howe was "like being savaged by a dead sheep". Or Muhammad Ali's "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee." Martin Luther King was the master of imagery, says Mr Atkinson, noting how his "I Have a Dream" speech started with an extended banking simile. "We have come to our nation's capital to cash a cheque" before going on to talk of the "tranquilising drug of gradualism". MOVE IT Amplification and the prevalence of wireless microphones enable speakers to get away from the lectern and walk as they talk. Mr Atkinson approves, so long as the speaker's movements aren't monotonous. "Moving around helps to drain the adrenalin; stops the build up of physical tension." PRACTISE The words alone are not enough. The best public speakers practise their delivery. "When I first started working with Paddy Ashdown he never practised his speeches," recalls Mr Atkinson of the former Lib Dem leader. "It never occurred to him. But I advised him and after that he would practise hard to the extent he would read his speech out to an empty conference hall the night before."Lend Me Your Ears by Max Atkinson will be published in September by Random House.

Has anything I've written ever been translated for Indian readers?

SCENE & HEARD and a missing BBC website magazine interview

What does anyone think of this 'new' title for my book - on schedule for publication in August, 2014.



And yesterday, I did an interview for the BBC website magazine but it seems to be unavailable, so you'll have to make do with PowerPoint' George Orwell & JFK and sundry other stuff:

1. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-14106031
2. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-12784072
3. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12215248

1. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/election_2010/8623158.stm
2. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/election_2010/8638929.stm
3. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/election_2010/8653002.stm
4. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8207849.stm

A question about 'ON MESSAGE: Conversation, Comment & Communication'?

Should I be worried if the publisher of my new book, 'SEEN AND HEARD' (coming out in August 2014) appears to make such heavy use of KeyNote? Comments on the above, title and/or anything else about the project (e.g how long should it be) will be especially welcome.

Another masterpiece from 3 years ago with loads of 3 Part Lists composed by Wobbly Williams

15 MARCH 2011

Results of the defend a doomed dictator speechwriting competition

In case you're wondering what this is all about, you can catch up on the details here:

• Defend a doomed dictator speechwriting competition
• The speeches
• Doomed dictator Twitter challenge: the sound bite winners

Results

And the (first-past-the-post) winner is .... Julien Foster for speech D(see below). Second is ... Bryn Williams for speech F (see below).

What clinched it for Mr Foster was that his final line made all three judges (and me) laugh.

Judges Collins and Finkelstein concluded: 'We thought E and D were amusing, which we thought was the right way to approach the contest. They were both funny and just plausible enough. But, if we had to choose between them, D just gets the nod for the simple yet inexplicable reason that the David Steel gag at the end really made us laugh.'

Judge Grender noted "Enjoyed all of these and laughed out loud at the thought of Gaddafi saying 'Go back to your constituencies – and prepare for government'. But in the end it was F who demonstrated the rhetorical flair that all good pupils of Max Atkinson (or avid readers ofLend Me Your Ears) aspire to. The use of 'wind' contrasted with 'fire' was great. The liberal use of 3-part sentences had echoes of the rhetoric of Obama's best not Gaddafi's worst. 'Step back' so we can 'march forward' gave it a nice strong ending. Have not as yet noticed an ad onWorking for You for a new speech writer for Libyan dictator, but if one comes up you should most definitely send in your c.v."

Thanks to everyone who took the trouble to enter the contest by submitting such high quality speeches and to Phil Collins, Danny Finkelstein and Olly Grender for passing judgement on them.

Olly Grender will obviously be receiving a previously unannounced Brown Nose Award for weaving an advertisement for one of my books into her comments.

First Prize: Speech D by Julien Foster

Friends, Libyans, Countrymen! Lend me your ears.

I come to bury Colonel Gadaffi, not to praise him.

I’m not going to read to you from a document.
But speak to you from the heart.

I’m not going to address you in classical Arabic.
But talk to you in Libyan.

Above all, I’m not going to hide from you.
I’m going to say it as it is.
And it may be a bit messy. But it’ll be me.

We now have a huge opportunity for change.
It’s an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

We’ve seen it happening in Egypt, in Tunisia…
…and now, here, in Libya.

Not change brought about by foreign governments.
Not change brought about by traitors.
But change brought about by us, the people.

And there are some who are trying to resist that change.
So I say to you very simply:
Go back to your constituencies – and prepare for government.

Second Prize: Speech F Mugabe's Last Stand by Bryn Williams

The West proclaim the winds of change blow through Africa once more.

They can't contain their pleasure.
Their smugness betrays them.
It clings to every word.

But these aren't the winds of change that blew in the past.
The winds which freed us from the bonds of slavery.
The winds which spared us from the blight of exploitation.
The winds which saved us from the suppression of our colonial masters.

These aren't winds founded on freedom or liberation.
These aren't winds at all.

These are fires.
Fires fuelled by exploitation.
Fires stoked by the resource thirsty tyrants of the West.
Fires lit to incinerate the fabric of our culture.

The West have learned that regime change doesn't work.
Afghanistan and Iraq have failed.
They have failed for two reasons.
Their cultures, like ours, are unsuited to democracy.
Their governments, unlike yours, are under Western control.

The West have learned that regime change doesn't work.
They are not prepared to risk it a third time.

Zimbabwe,
Believe me.
The West are not empowering a change of regime.
The West are implementing a change of policy.

A return to the policy of the past.
A return to the policy of exploitation.
A return to colonisation.

If controlling the government doesn't work,
become the government.

You are hearing whispers of a better future from people who are faceless.

You are not hearing firm declarations from the leaders of the future.
You are not hearing solid plans to deal with the problems of today.
You are not hearing robust proposals to pay off the debts of the past.

Why are there no leaders
no plans and
no money?

Because they don't exist.

The whisperers exist.
The rumour mongers exist.
Enemies always exist.

Waiting to exploit you,
your family,
and your future.

Whether we like it or not
this policy of African exploitation is a political fact.

So I ask you to take a moment,
take a deep breath,
and take a step back.

Take a step back from the future of their making.
So, together, we can march forward
to a future of our choosing.